Chalk it up as an experience from which to learn. Michael and I discovered Friday that wisdom, animal magnetism, boyish good looks, and an abundance of charm are not nearly enough to overcome angry young men bent on humiliating their benevolent elders.
Said more plainly, the two flat bellies, aka James and Pete, took to the golf course at Bulle Rock and thoroughly thumped the round bellies, aka Michael and Gary. Bottom line – a good time was had by some.
Bulle Rock is a beautiful place located about three and a half miles from Pendant’s HQ. Our intrepid foursome decamped for a tee time at 11:48 AM Friday. The competitive tension didn’t last much beyond that as the flat bellies ran off a string of holes won before the round bellies even had to pause for a pee! In short, it was over almost as soon as it started as the flat bellies relentlessly pounded drive after drive into the stratosphere, piling indignity on top of indignity, chortling all the while.
The stakes were steaks. This was agreed about a week before, which leads to another lesson. Never underestimate the power of free meat to motivate young carnivorous males.
Following the denouement, our group headed to Bel Air for the payout – a visit to one of the better restaurants in the area, One Eleven Main, after a pre-meal visit to Sean Bolan’s for a quick nip. Pete had spoken confidently all week about the Tomahawk Steak he planned to tuck into, and sure enough, it was one of the specials for the night. Thirty six ounces (including the weight of the ridiculously large bone) of expertly-prepared beef (apologies to Sai), which Pete resolutely consumed while Michael and I tallied up the tab in our heads. At the same time, Michael with his pasta, James with his salmon, and I with my veal chop, managed to enjoy meals designed for normal human beings.
After the other three watched patiently while Pete filled his belly, Pete graciously donated the remains to Michael, who tested what was left on the bone before requesting it to be wrapped up for the benefit of his dog at home.
We all fervently hoped Michael wouldn’t be accosted on his way home by a police man or woman who would obviously want to know what sort of weapon he was carrying with him. As far as we know, he arrived safely at home much to the delight of his dog.
It will take some time for Michael and me to lick our wounds and get back on the horse (I ran out of cliches to add to this). But make no mistake – next time we will be better prepared for the fury of the younger set, which will lead to a triumph of epic proportions and an even larger steak at the end. In the end, things like goodness and basic human decency always win, and Michael and I have those things in abundance. We probably won’t even chortle…